For years I did it too, I gave away my yoni. Without me realizing it.
I had sx where I didn’t even question IF I wanted it, that question just didn’t exist.
The thing that touches me most of all is sexual violence, abuse, rape.
Every time I see how a huge blow this is to the system. How hard people sometimes work to solve this trauma.
And in subtle or less subtle layer everyone has to deal with it. Whether someone else has done that to us or women to themselves.
It is one of THE collective injuries in the female base and sexuality.
Women still have the idea of having to ‘give themselves away’ for a man.
Subconsciously using sexuality to keep someone with you, to please, or whatever.
Every time we give away our yoni (so having sx without our yoni being really ready for it) your yoni thinks again: so my vote doesn’t matter, and will become a bit less sensitive.
So the first step for me and many others is to listen to her again, to honor her, to claim her ‘no’.
And then also to ’take’ what that might touch on the other person.
In this way we find our pelvis and base again, we reclaim our sexuality, because it is OURSELVES.
If we can really claim that no, we can only really say yes.
And in the end your partner wants that too, sexuality where both partners are a full yes is just… if you know that you don’t want more for less.
I pray for sexual healing. For both women and men, because I also know that there is enough pain in the men’s field.